Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Top Ten Tuesday: Witty & Brillant

Top Ten Snippets From Emails I’ve Received This Year
Because my friends are witty and brilliant and I think you may enjoy them
(also because I am feeling like crud and it’s much easier to copy and paste than to write anything witty or brilliant myself. All credit due to my friends, who are witty and brilliant.)

10. from a MOH who had yet to order her dress:
I promise i will not be wearing sweatpants at your wedding.

9. Would make me want to “hit them, baby, one more time”:
There is dance team practice outside my room right now. It is making me laugh. A lot. Britney has been on repeat for 45 minutes now.

8. Advice on how to handle the labor day weekend:
As for your “non-wedding Sunday” I vote you watch a HIMYM marathon. Or you can send me texts all day. Or you can make a voodoo doll of one of your favorite recent fiancés. Personally I vote you just eat some jello flavored with vodka constantly all day, even when at church :)

7. Ha:
There is ONE club in Mankato and EVERYONE makes fun of it-it's called the Haze. I went for the first time on Friday. . . . and met a guy. .. who is older... and very attractive…and enjoyable to talk to.

And I was thinking, "What are you doing here?!?!? This is NOT the place I am supposed to meet a guy." Obviously, he's an axe murderer (I mean, besides being a construction worker) Or maybe he believes that Napoleon Dynamite is the best movie ever made (I put both of those on equal levels of horribleness)

Anyway, we've been texting, and we may meet tomorrow. I expect to tell you all about this afterwards. I can't really tell anyone here, because they would say “do not go meet him. You met him at the Haze.” But then I'm like, well, I was at the haze. . . . I went to watch my Bosnian friend dance! (her name is Goga). So, maybe he was accidently there too?

6. Take a minute to picture yourself dressed all “western”:
remember how great homecoming week and all the spirit days were as a student? not so much as a teacher...

5. I just need a big hat and long fur coat:
I have a (somewhat) dorky favor to ask you- I am getting an online dating profile (yes, I know)...and I need your help with my "About Me" section. I draw blanks!! go ahead, pimp me out.

4. In response to my story about needing to have my gallbladder removed:
You really know how to not throw the twist ending everyone knows is coming into the story. I mean seriously, I was super excited to hear you say at the end, "and they were all wrong. I actually felt like crap because I have swine flu". And obviously it would be awesome 1) because you were clearly ok - you decided to write me an 8 page email and 2) I know someone who has swine flu. But alas, my hopes and dreams are ruined.

3. The cookie challenge has extra challenge:
While procrastinating yesterday, i came across an article about finding your happy weight. I went to self magazine's happy weight calculator to find mine. Let me tell you it was not a happy weight for me. It was unrealistically low for me for several reasons. One, it was less than i weighed for sophomore year, so as an adult, not likely to happen. Two, i really like cookies. Three, it is less than i weighed at my wedding (by almost 10 pounds) and i have set my wedding weight as a pretty good goal weight that does not involve me starving myself of working out three hours a day (as much fun as that would be). Four, i really, really like cookies.

2. Adventures will be had:
I was trying to find things to put in your package and I heard "I want to go see heather"
I looked around my empty room. It was coming from the area of scarves.

"I want to go see heather" The voice is muffled. I dig a little. A beautiful tanish, peachish, ummm, I don't know what color it is. it is a color that does not look that good on me, but would look really good on you.
"I want to go see heather"
well, yeah. don't we all?
I pull out the scarf. It is from England. It is used, but beautiful.
"Can I go? I'd really like to go be worn by heather!"
"Are you sure you want to leave all your friends?"
"I'm bored here! And you never wear me. I'd like to go to New York and keep heathers Neck warm during winter. I'm sure I would match her outfits. You never wear me. Besides, I'm ready for an adventure."

And off the little scarf went, jumping into the box. From my scarf collection to yours.

1. From the best email I received about the whole broken engagement thing:
That being said, I fully believe that you will (and already are) coming back stronger than ever. I'm keeping you in my thoughts and hoping for the best (and knowing it'll come). You've put too much love into the universe for it to not reward you back. He is your Aidan, I guess. Cute and nice and seemed like just right, but there's a Big of your own out there, just waiting. (Besides, your last name is just too cool to give up just yet.)

About that last one:

Sometimes I’ve been super silly and questioned if I will “be alone forever”. Sometimes the drama just takes over and I can’t help but feel like a character in some terribly sad melodrama destined to be single forever. Sometimes I feel that any time I meet a nice boy, he will find out that I had been engaged before and run away because I am “damaged”.

Now, before you all go telling me what a catch I am and that I would make “any guy really happy” let me just say this- I am aware that one day I will be in a relationship again. I am aware that the right guy will not only not run away when he hears that I was engaged, but stand right by me, helping me to get through the hard parts of healing and trusting and going forward in the beginning of a new relationship. And I am aware that “you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince” and I know that “God blessed the broken road that led me straight to….my future husband” and I know that one day I will walk down the aisle, and say I do, and share the first dance as husband and wife. But sometimes, I forget for a minute- and I feel sad, and sorry for myself, and angry, and heartbroken, and not enough.

Those times, I remember this email. Sometimes I reread it. Sometimes I just ponder on it. Sometimes I giggle at how much Shugarman trumps my almost-last name (it really is fabulous). Sometimes I watch episodes of SATC season four and realize that Aidan was great, but he wasn’t the one- and my former fiancé was great, but he wasn’t the one. And I am thankful. Because sometimes friends just KNOW what to say- the words “there’s a Big of your own out there, just waiting” mean so much more to me than any cliché about my worth and my future happily ever after ever will. And the words “your last name is just too cool to give up just yet” remind me to celebrate my singleness, my individual uniqueness, and this blessed time I have to continue to be the best me I can be.

And I am so grateful for people in my life who care enough, who understand me enough to not just spit out what they are suppose to say, but instead share what I need to hear- and what I need to rest in, even for months after it’s said. That goes beyond the author of that email, or any of the emails I shared pieces of today. That goes beyond people I grew up with, or have known for years. And that goes beyond people I have met in person. Sometimes the people that show the most care are people who leave comments on blog posts, and take part in twitter conversations, and support you even when they've never seen your face, or heard your voice, or hugged your neck. Sometimes the people that know and understand you the most are people that haven't spent anytime in a room with you. And for that, I am thankful, too. Thank you, friends. [i cherish you all; new and old]


  1. I love the comment about Aidan and Sex in the City. So True!

  2. I love the email about eating vodka jello all day - even at church. I probably would have had to do that. You are so strong.

  3. I loved your friends' e-mails. Isn't it great to have great friends?

  4. Your friends seem to be just as awesome as you!

  5. I'm glad I made the list. And I meant every word of my email!


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